Mensa AU Fic Exchange: "Heights" for tarlanx

[trobadora]

Title: Heights
Author: chanel_5
Pairing: Rod/John
Setting: MENSA-verse
Rating: Teen
Word count: 1650
Warnings: none
Summary: Request: Rod and John have to climb to safety - can be a mountain, or manmade (a building), inside or outside...anything high.
Notes: Dear Tarlan, I hope this fulfills your request. I tried to make it witty, but I don't know if that part came across right...
Recipient: tarlanx

Rod pulled up the information from the site of the rift again, hoping this time the numbers would reflect something other than the alternate universe losing all its ZPM power getting him home. He sighed, the numbers showing the same results as before. It's a sign of insanity, doing the same thing repeatedly and hoping for a different outcome. Maybe he was a little crazy; the Pegasus Galaxy could sure bring it out in people. Still, he looked at the results and couldn't help but feel remorse for the state he left the other Atlantis in.

The more arrogant Rodney was a visualisation of what he could easily have become. None of the traits Rodney personified were absent from Rod, Rod was just much better at hiding them. The confident Teyla, so unlike the mousy Teyla here, who couldn't hurt a fly. Ronon, well, he was pretty much the same. Colonel Sheppard, on the other hand, was the complete opposite of his universe's John. While fundamentally they were the same person, did the same job, looked identical, the lazy slouch Colonel Sheppard had, the guarded conversations, were nothing like his John's. Rod was used to an open, friendly, 'Call me John!'. A straight-forward commanding officer who was more at ease snorting at the bad science of Back to the Future than he was 'at ease'. And the language! His John could make a marine blush. Colonel Sheppard hadn't sworn once. It had made him feel like he should yell out obscenities every other sentence or so, just to keep some sort of balance.

He closed down the computer and turned off the screen. It was late and after the day he'd had he was looking forward to bed. He rubbed at his forehead trying to ward off a headache. Another scientist came into the lab as Rod approached the door.

"Hey there, Rod, I heard you had quite some day today."

"Yeah, it was an eye-opener, that's for sure. I'm glad it's over, though, and that the universe is still here and all."

"So am I." They both chuckled. "So, did you meet the other me?"

"No, I didn't get the opportunity to see much and you weren't in the lab, but I'm sure you were around somewhere. Anyway, buddy, I'm off to bed. See you in the morning."

"Wait, before you go. You should give John a hand home tonight. I don't think he'd like it if one of his soldiers ran in to him, you know how he gets."

"Is the Mensa meeting finished?"

"Um, Mensa meeting? I think so." He shrugged. "John's in the fifth hydroponics lab."

"Thanks, Kavanagh. Have a good night."

"You too, Rod."



Rod thought open the door and entered the room. The lab was full of luscious green shrubs and bushes, exotic flowers and grasses growing in the massive hanging trays that could be elevated and rotated to catch the best light. He called out to John and was about to leave, thinking John had already left, when the trays started moving and John came in to view.

"Quick, Rod, jump on!" John called out. As the tray he was on got close to Rod, John leant over the side and grabbed onto Rod's shirt, pulling him off the ground awkwardly and making Rod scramble to get onto the tray as it began to rise again.

Rod caught his breath on his hands and knees as the empty metal tray came to a stop at its highest level. "Are you trying to kill me?" Rod shouted. His blood was racing as adrenalin pumped through his body.

John was still gripping his shirt and held on even as he flopped onto his back and let out a heartfelt sigh. "It's ok, I saved you. I saved you."

"I was perfectly fine with my two feet on the ground. Saved me from what?"

"Atlantis! She's trying to kill me!" John sprang up, making Rod flinch. He'd never tell anyone, but he actually wasn't all that... fond... of heights. "And she'll probably try to get you, too." John let go of Rod's shirt to cup his hands around Rod's head and peer into Rod's face. "I'm serious. We're in mortal danger, but we're safe up here." John said beseechingly.

Finally Rod noticed what he probably would have as soon as he saw John, if he hadn't been flailing about 15 feet off the floor. "Jesus, John. Are you high?"

"Maybe? But that's not important. You've got to help me, save me from Atlantis."

Rod sighed internally. It was late. Really late, because late had actually come and gone while he was still in his lab. And he was tired. He thought about calling Lorne but decided that Kavanagh was right; John wouldn't like any of his men to see him that way. That left talking him down, or getting Ronon down to stun him. He was seriously considering the second option. He sighed again.

"Right, then. So why is Atlantis trying to kill you?"



"...And then the effing lights brightened and then I got a shock and then the lights went dim and then I hit my knee on the rail and I could hear this maniacal freaking laughter coming from behind me. I was going to call you but I think she stole my damn radio because it was just gone so I climbed up here and then-"

"Ok, Ok. I get it. Atlantis is trying to kill you," he said in his most placating but not quite patronising voice. He'd perfected that tone a long time ago. "The question is why?"

"Because," John said very seriously, "I'm gay."

"So? I'm gay, but you don't see me perched on a botanics tray ten meters off the ground. Well, you do right now, but that's your entire fault anyway, you and Mary Jane."

"You're gay? But I thought you were practically married to Colonel Carter that time. If you're gay and I'm gay, we should be gay together, don't you think? Carter stinks, like really bad B.O. and she kisses like a fish." The little fish faces John pulled were really not cute on a grown man. "I like you so much more than she does and I kiss better too. I'll show you." He leaned over Rod who fended him off, grabbing onto John's shoulder as the tray swayed a little.

"You can show me later, when I'm not at risk of falling to my certain death."

"Promise? You have to promise."

"Yes, yes, sure. I promise. But for now, why don't you explain to me what your preference for men has to do with Atlantis trying to off you?"

"Don't you get it? She loves me! And now she knows I'm gay and if she can't have me, no one can. It all makes perfect sense in her psychotic little A.I. mind.—You're really gay?"

Rod sighed again for the umpteenth time that night and clicked his radio.


***


John woke gradually, his eyes gritty as they adjusted to the morning light. He wasn't in his room. He was also too warm but when he tried to pull off the covers they were caught. He rolled onto his back and stilled instantly as his arm came into contact with another, an arm he quickly worked out belonged to Rod. He was going to slide out of the bed quietly without waking Rod but the t-shirt covered man was already opening his eyes, sitting up quickly when he saw John looking down at him.

"Hi."

"Good morning?"

"Yeah. So, Rod, how the hell did I end up here?"

"You don't remember? Urgh, it's too early for this. Basically, your night started with a fake Mensa meeting and ended when Ronon and I brought you here, high as a kite and also somewhat paranoid and delusional. I think you should cut back on that wacky tobaccy. You know normally I don't care what people do in their own time, but frankly I don't think it's good for you."

"You couldn't have taken me to my own room?"

"We did. Then there was screaming and very-almost public urination. You also threw your shoe at Ronon. He said to tell you you're not getting it back."

"Oh. So why am I in your bed?"

"That one I don't have an answer for. When I fell asleep you were over there." He pointed to the couch covered with a sheet. A blanket rivered across the gap between the end of the cushion and Rod's bed. "But, hey, at least you brought your pillow over."

John's face was about as red as the mylo fruit they got from M9X507. "Is there any chance that if I just leave now this will all just be forgotten and never talked about again? Cause that would be ok with me."

"Sure, there's a chance. But don't you want me to keep the promise I made last night?"

"What was that?"

"Here, I'll show you." Rod pushed himself up and then leaned forward, gently pressing his lips against John's. John didn't respond for a moment and Rod made to pull back when finally John made a little noise in his throat and chased back after Rod, pulling his arm around Rod's neck and anchoring him in place. He leaned into Rod, opening his mouth a little and letting his tongue taste Rod's bottom lip. Rod reciprocated, rubbing his hand up John's side and down his back. John groaned and pushed Rod down to the bed, both men on their sides, deepening the kiss.

"Wait a minute," John said as he pulled his lips away from Rod's for a moment. "You're gay?"

Rod sighed.

[Poll #1178499]